Connection takes on many forms... It could be a phone call or letter from a dear friend. It could be the first robin you see in March when you're wishing for winter to end. It could be a meal at the end of the day, or a simple look from across the room. Connection is key to our survival. For me it brings the gift of togetherness, security, and love. Like this beautiful capture of mare and foal, connection is pure love. Connection creates energy that moves with purpose and desire.
It has taken me a terribly long time to see that connection, in it's purest form has nothing to do with how much I can do for another human being. I used to think the only way I was valued by humans - and possibly animals, was how much I worked for them. How much of myself did I give to them - physically, emotionally, and mentally. I would put my entire being into work, just to be sure I was valued, wanted, accepted in some way. The concept of believing in what I was doing was a secondary purpose. My motivation was purely to be valued by others because I always felt I was not enough. There was no way that someone would actually want to spend time with me, speak to me, listen to me, or sit in silence with me for no other reason than because they actually valued me. That was incredibly foreign in my mind. I often wonder how I could get such an important life lesson about worth so mixed up...
I've been an educator all my life, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a girlfriend, a wife, a mother, a business owner and entrepreneur, and yet I still struggle with being "enough". I used to think there was something wrong with me, like I had this terrible illness that was infecting my sweet mind - that my optimism, my creativity, and love for life was being over taken by this ridiculous notion that I had been right all along - I am NOT enough... It was probably some of the darkest moments of my life. Sound familiar?
My family hasn't always been 100 % supportive and sometimes those mixed messages would allow my mind to go down the negative path. I would allow it because that was what felt "normal". My horses and a little donkey I recently met have told me on a regular basis that I am more than enough. They look into my eyes beyond the surface of what I look like, see into my soul, and say, "No darling, you are MORE than enough." How do they know this? How do these animals look at me and literally speak to me with such kind words and affirmations. I guess a better question to ask is why haven't I listened? Touché'
And then there is the herd... A group of women who I know nothing about and everything about all at the same time. They are REAL and genuine, smart and beautiful. They are everything I want to be and everything I aspire to be. I love their passion, their uniqueness, and their desire to make a difference in this broken world. There is something so special about finding your herd after wandering for years without one. I have a very small number of incredibly special friends in my life. I can count them on one hand and they have been in my corner for years. I've always called them my pack... but now I have an entire HERD of women in my corner. It's the most wonderful connection I have ever experienced. If there is one thing I know for sure, we are not alone in our struggles and we are not alone in our desire to make this one life the very best life we could possibly imagine. Connections - meaningful, genuine, and purely innocent are the best ones to have. I am blessed to have so much support - without them doing a thing, just being themselves, being authentic, being real - something horses have been showing us how to do since the beginning of time....
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