Rules for overwhelm... and how to keep it out of your life

The grocery store check out line is where I used to experience overwhelm... It was that place where my need for financial responsibility, my choices of what I put in my cart, and the speed at which the check out person was racking up my bill seemed to crash into me all at once. I've never liked check out lines. I don't really know why, maybe it's from some long lost memory of being in a check out line with my mother. That's probably for another day.

At any rate, what we call overwhelm in our lives can truly scare the hell out of us, to the point of avoided that activity all together. I've never been a shopper per say, but I think it's the feeling of overwhelm that I don't like the most.

What overwhelms you? Family, relationships, job responsibilities, self inflicted goals, the house, the lawn, the kids, dinner, colleagues, money, etc, etc. We all experience these hurdles. Subconsciously, I stand in the storm as a silent observer. I have a tendency to just sit back and watch for awhile, literally removing myself from the situation. I decided long ago that by doing this, it might be beneficial for the moment, but completely disconnecting is not going to solve anything and the overwhelm will not go away on its own. I must take a hold of the reins and be the one guiding my path. I made rules for myself about overwhelm because it is the one thing I want to avoid the most in my life. I absolutely hate it.. among other things. I have a small list going of all the other things I would prefer to avoid, but overwhelm is definitely the top one. There is nothing worse to me than to feel overwhelmed. It also brings up feelings of failure, no sense of control, worthlessness, and if I'm being honest, being drowned.

It occurred to me that no one should ever feel that way, especially when they are not actually drowning, something I've experienced in my life and don't want to again. No one should FEEL that way when they are merely going about their day and making a living, making a life. So, I made some rules:

1. I only feel overwhelm when I give others the power to make decisions for me.

2. I only feel overwhelm when I do not listen to my self... and my intuition.

3. I only feel overwhelm when I forget about the boundaries I have for myself and allow others to cross them.

These three rules changed my life. They are my agreements I have made with myself. They keep me from ever allowing overwhelm in. It doesn't matter what the situation is now, I know that I can still be myself, the quiet observer, the one who doesn't need to react - there's no good that comes from reacting unless you are saving someone from getting hurt. I honor these rules because they are for me... I can only hope everyone makes their own rules about overwhelm and any other feeling they would prefer to avoid that stifles living a life of joy and ease. You may call it the elephant in the room, but I feel that elephant wants and needs some attention and possibly a rule or two. I now know I am more of an elephant tamer than I thought. You can too when you approach the things you would rather avoid with a little curiosity and grace.

How long will you live feeling overwhelmed, unhappy, or stuck? The decision is completely yours to make. I decided long ago, my energy wasn't being used in the ways that created a sense of worthiness for myself. Who knew that making rules for ourselves, those little secrets of highly successful people, would truly make a difference. Need help getting started? I'm here when you are ready.