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Feeling is Believing

Who knew that our bodies speak first? I sure as heck didn't. I was a firm believer in mind over matter. In fact, most of us, if we were brought up as athletes, or driven to accomplish something beyond our own beliefs, were conditioned to ignore our bodies until we couldn't ignore them any more. I feel as though I have crossed some threshold where all I do is listen to my heart and body - and also what it's trying to tell me after years of ignoring all those little signs.

Who knew our bodies carry trauma - and that phenomenal ability to store it away in our cells so that we don't uncover it in any way shape or form until a vibration might stir it loose, or it grows into disease that engulfs the rest of our cells. I for one continually focus on healing my body now, rejuvenating it from years of over work, childhood trauma, and the fact that there was never time to sleep in the last twenty years. I'm famous for the line, "I'll sleep when I'm dead." Well, I don't want to sleep when I'm dead.... I want to sleep now. I want to FEEL what well rested actually is. I want to FEEL I'm doing the right thing in my life. I'm tired of feeling everyone else.

As an empath, and one that is so ridiculously sensitive to minute vibrations in another beings presence, I'm lost in a world of sensation. I feel everything around me all at the same time. Much like a dog that hears so many things and has to learn how to focus on one thing at a time. I had to do that with people's energy, pain, and even their thoughts. There's a lot of sadness in the world and it's just millimeters away from overflowing at any moment. I believe everyone reading this, whether you are empathic or not, should always look your self in the mirror and see what is right, because everything about you is right... There is no wrong. Period.

I feel right when I am connected with others. Not in a "hi, how are you?" kind of way... No, not at all. Small talk is for amateurs. I have a hard time wading through the small talk, ever so patiently waiting for us to get to what really matters in your life. What was the best part of your day? How do you feel about that? What was the worst? Do see you see an opportunity there? I want to have substance in our conversations. I want to connect in a way that shifts our perspectives and leaves us with roots that hold on like a willow tree near a stream. There's so much "noise" out there in human land. Does anyone else hear it? All the chattering about literally nothing! None of it matters, not like how you feel matters. Like your favorite chair just waiting for you to melt into, there is where the essence lies.

Honestly, I struggle with these same questions.

The best part of my day was the 15 minutes I took to write in my journal while sitting in the paddock, watching the horses run and play, birds singing all around me, and the weather, well, I don't know what's happening, but it was 50 degrees today! I was grateful for the time. So very grateful for time. Normally, I would be rushing to get my horses out to their paddocks and rushing off to work. The worst part of my day was when I started to feel like I was wasted time by being at home, not at an office - even though I worked all day at my job - just from home, vacuumed the house during lunch, and got to chat with two wonderful women during a zoom call.

So what's the point? I guess the point is, listen to your body when it speaks. Listen to your heart, your soul. Sometimes it really won't make sense at the moment, but that doesn't matter. In the long run, everything will become clearer. You can never be wrong when you listen to that part of you that matters most. The part that says, "hey, I'm here, I matter!"

Take good care of yourself so you can take good care of others. I wish I would have taken that advice earlier in life. I believe that with all my heart. There is no need for people pleasing. There is only your calling in this life. What are you called to do?

My heart drives me to care for others. I can't help it. I feel like there are so many of us out there that will drop everything to help someone else in need. There is never a reason to go it alone with so many people out there that feel you - and have a yearning for connection. Don't ever forget that. You are not alone.

I feel love every day, mainly from the animals in my life. I see how Walter watches me from the window of our kitchen - the ever watchful angel that seems to always know where I am. That little dog would run to the ends of the earth to find me. I often wonder how we know one another so well in the short time that we've been together. Animals have a way of bringing out our truest nature, that is for sure. Javi and Raven, Magic, Lily & Caesar are now my fab five. Ten years ago, I only dreamed of having a horse, let alone five. It didn't seem possible. We were living in a hut on the side of the ocean. All I'm saying is, take care of your body, listen to your heart - and everything will fall into place. Those little choices each day will guide you when you're living for your health and happiness. Happy Heart Month.

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